Pull the Lever (Part 2)

View Part 1 of Pull the Lever.

Gin awoke to the sounds of fires crackling and the smell of smoke in the air. The explosion should have killed it, but he didn’t FEEL dead. He body ached as he blinked his eyes open. He knew he should get up and get out of there, but he was still trying to reason how he survived. He was sure it was just a matter of math, which he was usually pretty good at figuring out in his head; yet he couldn’t seem to do it now.

As he got to his feet, the answer became clearer; his body had changed again. He was much more feminine than he had been. He likely fused with another woman, possibly several. It used to be easy for him to triangulate things like where they must have been standing and how many just by thinking, but his brain struggled now. He considered himself lucky to be able to reason that his mind must have been fused this time as well with most of his genius gone in an instant. He still remembered who he was, the fusions, and the machine malfunction, but couldn’t remember why he had built the machine in the first place or what it was actually supposed to do. He certainly no longer had the ability to recreate the thing. He remembered plots of television shows he never watched and about promising to meet a friend at the gym tonight. Then another small explosion snapped him back to more immediate concerns. He picked himself up and started getting out of this death trap. He stumbled in the heels he wore, so he ripped them off and went barefoot. Knowing how to walk in those things was NOT something he remembered how to do either. But was that something he should remember?

Invasive Procedure

“This sucks,” Marisa said with a frown, “I don’t want to be in your body! I like wearing cute clothes and painting my nails! Do you think this is permanent? Or do you think that weirdo old guy is going to come back and put our brains back in the right bodies?”

“I think that brain transplantation is likely very invasive,” Dave replied, “Whatever damage was done to our nervous systems is probably going to exponential if we undergo a second procedure.”

“You sound way too calm about this. Aren’t you freaking about being a woman?”

“I should be, shouldn’t I? And yet I’m not. Maybe it’s the a neural pathway that wasn’t reconnected. Or maybe the mad scientist just removed the part of my brain responsible for that.”

“Why would he do that?”

“Why would he switch our brains in the first place? The guy was absolutely crazy! Do you know he showed me a man that he tried to graft gills onto? Maybe we should be thankful that this was the worst thing that happened to us.”

“I’d rather have gills.”

“The guy with gills was dead, Marisa.”

Brawl

Body swapping and alcohol were often a dangerous mix as bars and clubs weren’t immune to the effects of the Great Shift.

Cliff was trying to wrap his head around what had happened to him -- suddenly going from a drunk, burly, white man to a petite Asian woman on her first drink of the night. When he sensed a man running towards him shouting about a “stolen body,” he was able to react quickly, grabbing the man around the neck and slamming his head on the bar. Cliff credited his victory to his training at the gym and the fact that his new body was sober; seeing how much bigger the other person’s body was, he considered himself pretty lucky.

But there were countless other brawls all around him with people shouting about stealing bodies and trying to get back to normal. Cliff just sat back and watched, taking another swig of his beer, as he realized things might never go back to normal...

The Concert (Part 1)

I think the last time I was on a stage was over 20 years ago when singing in my fifth grade chorus concert. I certainly never expected to be in front of 10,000 people wearing a skimpy outfit. I remember freezing as I stared out into the masses; before I knew what was going on, I was being rushed backstage.

It allowed me to take more stake of the situation, and to come to realize I was a woman now. Apparently, there was some sort of wide spread body swap thing that went on. There were three other woman dressed in a similar outfit to what I had on -- presumably the bodies of the other performers in the group. I was the only one of the four that hadn’t actually been attending the concert before the swap, and I thought I was the only one that had been a guy before as well.

The first woman I spoke to was a mom. She was mostly concerned with getting back out there to look for her daughter, who she had brought to the concert. I wasn’t going to trouble her with questions.

The next I spoke to was pretty excited about her new body. She spoke quite honestly about being an overweight nerdy student before and how excited she was to find herself in the fit body of one of these Kpop stars.

The final woman just sort of sheered at me. “No hablo inglés, chica,” She scoffed.

“No soy una chica,” I said, remember some spanish I had learned years ago.

It took some cajoling, but I eventually did figure out that the final woman actually used to be a guy like myself. He had been working as a janitor at the venue and saw the body swap as a way out of his misterable life, and (unlike the student) mostly wanted to keep his former life under wraps.

Stormy

Harris and Elaina had been very careful with the Medallion of Zulu so far. The married couple had often used it to swap with each other for a short time while always being very mindful of where they kept it.

With the massive storm predicted, they were both in their own bodies with the medallion locked up. Everything seemed safe. They didn’t expect the storm to get as bad as it did. Their house ended up flooded, and the box containing the medallion was washed away. But that wasn’t the worst part.

It seemed an errant bolt of lightning had hit the box, having an odd effect on the body swapping medallion. The lightning was diffused and ended up swapping bodies across a number of people throughout town, including Harris, who now found himself in a woman’s body. He didn’t know her name or who she was. She seemed to be in her 20s, much younger than he and his wife. Having used the medallion to swap with his wife, he wasn’t exactly unfamiliar with being a woman, but he knew he still had to pretend to be ignorant and shocked at this whole thing.

After all, if anyone knew he and his wife were even indirectly responsible, they would surely not be treated kindly. So as the town went through a massive cleanup effort, Harris made a specific point of trying to find the box with the medallion in it. He might have to tell the truth at that point, but at least he could get everyone who had been swapped back to normal. That is IF he could find the medallion in this mess.

Dumberer

Ever since the transformation, it had become hard for me to concentrate. I tried to tell myself there was no way the stereotypes about blonde women were true, but I could often find myself spontaneously giggling or acting overtly feminine for no reason. At times, it was hard to remember I used to be a guy.

Trying to focus was also a challenge. Almost every time I started surfing the web, I’d end up on sites with stories or captions about men turning into women. I even tried to focus while at the library -- hoping the public setting would keep me on track -- but it didn’t matter. I soon found myself subscribing to Alicia’s TG Captions on DeviantArt.

Was it possible that my my hair got a shade blonder and my IQ dropped 10 more points after subscribing? It sure felt like it! But I couldn’t seem to stop myself from doing it either.

---

Sorry for the somewhat shameless plug of my DeviantArt page, but it's pretty much going full steam now. There are some captions that are posted there first and then on here. There are some exclusive captions for people who do the "A Little Shift" level of subscribing over there. And, don't worry, there are still some captions exclusive to this site, too!

Get to the Hospital

“You can’t have the baby on the street, Liz. Come on, we’ve got to get in a taxi to get you to the hospital.” Dave was begging practically begging as his wife’s contractions were getting closer together.

It was something Liz had never told her husband. It was before she got pregnant, before she met Dave, long before she was called ‘Liz’ or was even a ‘she.’ She had been a man named Todd, working a busy job in the City when he got into the cab that one night. That’s when he swapped into the driver’s body; a few weeks later, he had used the magic taxi to steal Liz’s body in just the same way. He vowed to never use a taxi again.

He had enjoyed Liz’s life; he enjoyed being a woman. He loved going on dates and eventually meeting Dave. Marrying this man had been the best moment of his life. He had avoided taxis this entire time. But now they were expecting a baby and taking the subway or a bus wasn’t really an option. Sure, the likelihood of getting into the magic taxi a second time was so small, but he didn’t want to take even the smallest risk of giving up all that he had gained since becoming Liz. And yet Dave was right, he couldn’t have this baby on the street...he did need to get to the hospital.

It's a Nightmare

“What the hell? What the hell is this?” Brendon said as he looked down to see a body other than his owned wearing a floral top and skirt.

“It’s a nightmare. That’s what it is,” Anna said speaking from Brendon’s body.

He looked over. “Nightmare for me! You have the unique opportunity to be in the body of a peak male speciman!”

“Peak...male...you’ve got to be kidding me? I can feel the gas building up inside your gut, and I’m not sure which way it wants to come out; I feel my breath wheezing from that cigarette you smoked earlier, which I can still taste; and don’t get me started on your thinning hair!”

“Don’t be jealous, Babe. My bod is 100% keeping it real. Unlike you. I can feel like an inch of makeup on your face and I’m pretty sure these are silicon --”

“They’re real!” Steamed Anna.

“Whatever. They don’t feel real from this perspective.”

“You wouldn’t even know what real ones feel like...But maybe we focus on getting our bodies back instead of insulting each other? These things above our heads have to do something.”

“Leave it to the alpha male,” Brendon said as he stood up to tinker with the devices above their heads, breaking them almost instantly...

Complexity (Part 2)

View Part 1 of Complexity.

While Luca, Ksenia, and Emma had embraced their new lives in different bodies almost instantly. Nell, Vince, and Kris took a little longer to resign themselves to the fact that they weren’t going to swap back, despite Kris’s attempts to fix the body swapping device.

It was several months later, and none of the friends had spoken to each other since the swaps between them. Nell was still angry at being stuck in Vince’s body but also about just how selfish so many of her friends had been; the only exception had been Kris, who spent a solid week trying to fix that device so she could swap back to her own body. She decided he deserved an apology and maybe more.

Having swapped with Ksenia, Kris was residing in her house and living her life. It wasn’t a bad life by any means. Ksenia had rich parents (before they died) and it allowed her to pursue a career as an artist. When Nell arrived, she found the door unlocked and walked right in. She was surprised to see Kris sitting on the floor still working on the device. Nell coughed to get his attention.

“Nell?” He asked before jumping up to give her a hug, “It’s so good to see you! I have good news! I’ve fixed it. Well, I’ve ALMOST fixed it! You and Vince will be able to swap back to your own bodies.”

“Oh,” Nell said sounding almost disappointed, “That’s...that’s great.”

“What’s wrong?” Kris asked, noticing something was off instantly.

“I came...I came here to say sorry. And...and to ask you out...on a date. I realized how kind you were earlier that night, and then when we all swapped?” Nell was on the verge of tears, “You kept trying to help. And now I find you’ve spent the last months CONTINUING to try to help?”

Kris hugged Nell even harder. “I love you too, Nell, but I never imagned you actually liked me like that. Though it’s a little weird considering our bodies...but maybe we can use the device...”

“The minute I saw it, I thought of that. But if I swap back to normal, well, I’m not a lesbian. It’ll never work. And if we swap with each other, you KNOW Vince is going to find out. He’ll demand to be put back in his body. And I know you, Kris, you’re too nice to not let him have it. But if you stop trying to fix it, then we stay like this. It’s a moral loophole. You don’t have to solve everyone’s --”

Kris interupted Nell’s ramble with a kiss before pulling back and nodding to gently agree with her plan.

Diminutive

Anders was used to making a loud thud when he fell. After all, he was a pretty big guy. But there was something strangely diminutive about the thud when he fell down this time. But why had he even fallen? He had felt a little dizzy, but he had stood through worse. Then he noticed the unusual shoes on his feel, which were attached to thin legs. His whole body was downright skinny, not to mention feminine!

He put his hand to his head. This was wrong; it was all wrong! But there had to be an answer or a reason for all of this. With few options, he began to dig through the bag at his feet, figuring it belonged to the woman he had become.

As he did so, a man walked by and nodded. “You too?” The man asked.

“Are you also...in the wrong body,” Anders felt weird speaking with someone else’s voice.

“Yep,” The man replied, “So are a lot of people.”

Nothing Too Weird

As Josh entered his early morning statistics class, he took a seat in the front next to his girlfriend Fei and greeted her with his usual, “What’s up, Babe?”

She didn’t speak in response, only glancing back at him with a look that made him think like he had done something wrong -- though he had no idea what that could be.

Before he could speak, he felt a firm pair of arms wrap around him. It was uncharacteristic of his buddy Mitch to be so friendly. Josh could only mutter, “Uh, hey, Mitch.”

“Actually, that’s Fei. I’m Mitch,” His girlfriend (or at least her body) said, “Some sort of weird body switching happened between us last night. We can’t explain it. We couldn’t fix it.”

Josh tried to hide his discomfort at this news as he forced a smile and repeated awkwardly, “What’s...up... Babe?”

“It was a hard night, but I’m feeling better now that I’m with you!” Fei said as bubbly as she could using Mitch’s voice.

“I’m fine with the PDA, just don’t do anything too weird in private with my body, okay?” Mitch requested.

Trip

I discovered my power one day while at the mall. I know malls used to be cool, but these days they are the lame last resort for when you can’t wait for two-day shipping. I just wanted to get in and out when the woman in front of me just wouldn’t move. When I tried to get around her on the left, she moved left; and when I tried on the right, she moved right. I just decided to dart quickly and ended up running into her. It wasn’t a major collision, more like a minor brush. But it was enough for me to realize a part of my body was actually going through her as if I were a ghost. Thing escalated from there.

I want to see how far I could take it. I tried to make my entire body ethereal and attempt to pass straight through her. It didn’t go so well. I made it about halfway when I got stuck inside and found myself possessing her.

The idea of becoming someone else was actually sort of cool. But if I had actually known I could do that, I probably wouldn’t have picked a 40 year old woman. I walked awkwardly in her heels, I was certainly holding her purse all wrong, and who knows if I advertantly flashed someone due to the fact that I was completely unfamiliar with wearing a dress. And I was stuck in her body for three days untill her balding fat husband came back from a business trip. Suggesting a trip to the bedroom was enough to make me want to throw up, which seemed to eject my corporeal form when I got the bathroom to gag. I got out as fast as I could, leaving the woman to explain to the husband why a young man was there running out of the house.

Magical Help

“I don’t think it’s working,” Eric said.

“Yeah, we’re still in each other’s bodies,” Kristie sighed, “I thought you were some sort of magic witch.”

“I am.” Angelica insisted, “And a body swap is usually a pretty simple spell, so whatever affected you two was powerful as I can’t seem to reverse it. However --”

“However what?”

“I can at least help you deal with this. I can place a minor spell on you both so that you’ll be comfortable with your current gender. It should prevent the most awkward moments. You’ll still know you’re in the wrong body, but at least you’ll feel like you’re the correct gender.”

“What happens if we swap back while this spell is upon us?” Eric asked.

“You’ll know you’re back in your original body, but it will feel like your gender is wrong. It’ll be like your trans, except you won’t really know how to cope with being the gender you were born as. But given how powerful the magic that swapped you is, I don’t foresee that happening easily.”

Kristie and Eric exchanged knowing glances before agreeing. Angelica placed her hands on their head and they began to glow. Eric could feel the changes in his mind. He knew he was still in Angelica’s body, but things like how he struggled to put on a bra this morning now seemed more comical than frustrating! Of course he know how to put on a bra, and why was he even focusing on that? There was nothing strange about him wearing one...

An Argument (Part 2)

View Part 1 of An Argument.

It was a few weeks later, and both Stanley and his wife had adapted well enough the the Great Shift. They had both changed genders as a result of the Shift, which was a challenge but not an insurmountable one. Stanley felt weird wearing the clothes of his former body, and it felt even stranger when it came time to use her tampons. When they ran out, he found himself back in the store he had been in when the Shift first happened.

As he looked, he got a text from his wife.

The conversation went as follows:

Reading a report that says ppl tended to swap w crushes and such. You weren’t checking out the woman you swapped with that day, were you?

What? I told you I was just watching them argue.

It’s okay if you were! I totally get it now anyway! I’ve been checking out women right and left...not that you’re new body isn’t beautiful! It just is part of being a guy that I’m learning, I guess!

Stanley wasn’t quite sure how to respond. His mind swirled with a range of emotions from guilt to feeling unattractive to jealousy and so much more. Ultimately, he typed back a message asking about which type of tampons he should buy -- the selection was vast, and he was happy to change the subject!

Possessed

It started as a voice in his head; Bernard was wondering if he was going crazy when he heard it. The woman’s voice laughed while saying something about taking over. Bernard did his best to ignore it as she continued to speak in his brain, explaining her story as an ancient Asian princess, her curse, and her ability to possess people. She got quite annoyed at his indifference while muttering something about showing off her power.

Bernard felt briefly uncomfortable, but once again tried to put it out of his mind until he saw his reflection in a store window. She screamed when he saw a woman staring back instead of his usual face. The voice confidently stated she would not be pushed aside, and that this was just the start. She had control to transform his body and would soon have control over his mind!

Yet Bernard wasn’t even paying any attention to the voice; he was too worried about what had just happened to his body! As it bit of unintentional luck, the fact that he just wasn’t paying any mind to the voice was what was keeping him in control and preventing her from possessing him. She had hoped the transformation would make him put his guard down for a moment, but he didn’t. And she was getting ready to move on, to try to possess another -- and it might just be fun to leave Bernard stuck with this transformed body as she did.

Three

Devin, Ron, and James had become friends during college and ended up becoming roommates shortly thereafter. They were hanging out together when the Great Shift happened, and by odd coincidence, they ended up swapping into the bodies of three sisters. Now with a technical genetic bond, they became closer than ever.

But it was Devin who would break up the trio, announcing to his friends one day that he was going to get married to Karen, the sister who was now in his body.

“No way!” Ron protested, “I thought we were all going to become old lesbians together.”

“Well we can’t be lesbians with each other,” James noted, “That’s just be gross.”

Despite his departure, the three remained close. And a year after the wedding, Devin had even more news. He was pregnant!

Ron immediately placed his hand on Devin’s belly. “Make it kick!” He commanded.

“It doesn’t work like that!” Devin smiled.

Longer

Things were just starting to get back to normal after the Great Shift swapped the bodies of 90% of the people on the planet. Edward considered himself fairly lucky to have swapped with his wife, Marie. He figured it kept the logistics of things fairly simple, other than having to deal with a new gender obviously.

Marie warned that he wasn’t prepared for quite how big a change that would in the outside. After buying tickets to one of the first post-Shift baseball games, she gave him a particular warning about long lines for the restroom that women often had to deal with. He dismissed the concern; he probably shouldn’t have.

The line snaked around the stadium. Edward knew he was missing several innings worth of action, and it still felt like he had a long ways to go. And the worst part was that was sure he was going to pee his pants waiting in this line. It was not only just as bad Marie had warned but worse -- the combination was a result of an inadequate number of bathrooms for women coupled with an increase in attendance due to men being in women’s bodies as well as many of those men still being unfamiliar and a little slower with their now female bodies.

Arrivals and Departures (Part 1)

Frank was a businessman with places to be. He was cursing the fact that his plane was late. If it didn’t come soon, he’d be late for the first meeting of the conference. With a flash of light, he was suddenly sitting on a plane instead that was coming to a rough, jerky halt. Finding himself suddenly on a plane undergoing a rough landing, it took him a moment to realize the body he had was no longer his own. He wasn’t sure how he even started to notice. Maybe it was the ripped jeans instead of his suitpants. Then there was the shirt not quite long enough to cover his belly -- not to mentioned the unfamiliar anatomy beneath these clothes.

Frank was no longer concerned about being late. He was much more concerned with the fact that he was in someone else’s body! It took forever to get the plane evacuated. By the time it happened, most of the airport was cleared out. Flights were cancelled and people told to leave. The televisons were still on with news stories explaining the Great Shift -- which explained why Frank (and just about everyone else) had swapped bodies. But he had no many more questions.

Personal Demon

Death. I suppose it happens to us all sooner or later. For me, it just happened to be sooner; I was in a fatal car crash at 32 years old. And perhaps I shouldn’t have been surprised that I went straight to hell (apparently most people do).

As you might imagine, the bureaucratic process in hell was long and painful before I was assigned my very own personal demon. And, as was probably intentional, she looked exactly like my most hated ex-girlfriend.

“Let me guess?” I asked, “My own personal hell is getting stuck with my overly needy ex, Kathryn, all the time? She’ll annoy me for all eternity, and I can never leave her?”

“Oh, no. No, no, no.” The demon responded with a grin, “Except the last part. You see, your torture isn’t going to be WITH Kathryn for all time; you’re going to BE Kathryn for all time. I’m just sort of previewing the form for you; we’ll be swapping bodies in a moment. And from that moment on, well...think about how much you hate her presently; now imagine how much you’ll hate BEING her. Everything that you hated about her and everything that annoy you, you won’t be able to stop yourself from doing. Oh, and in hell, you’ll get a period once a week. Have fun!”

Pockets

“So...it’s everyone? Like, EVERYONE everyone?” Oscar asked the woman now inside of his body.

“That was what the alert on your phone said,” Megan said pulling it out, “There are isolated incidents of a few people here or there not swapping bodies, but otherwise...well, the entire world is in the same boat as we are.”

“Jesus...” Oscar trailed off while moving his hands to parts of his body that felt very strange to him.

Megan frowned, “Please don’t do that.”

“I’m sorry. It’s just that I’m used to something obviously being down there, you know? Or technically, something ELSE being down there. At least we’re the only ones here. I can’t imagine the chaos of all this in a place like downtown.”

“Oh, you should go get my phone from the locker room; my boyfriend is down there. He might be trying to get in touch with me.”

“Why didn’t you just stick it in your pocket and workout with it?”

“You have a LOT to learn about your new gender. Check out the pants your wearing; do you SEE any pockets?”

Just a Few Days (Part 2)

View Part 1 of Just a Few Days.

As Hunter walked back to Brooke’s dorm room, he still couldn’t believe he was going to be in her body for a few days! That meant he’d be taking a shower, changing her clothes, and using the bathroom. Thinking of doing all those things as a woman was exhilarating, but there was also need to rush into any of them. In fact, with Brooke’s roommate, Kim, studying when he arrived in her room, he simply put on a sweatshirt and sat down on the bed.

Not more than a moment later, Kim closed her book and turned to Hunter. “You all ready for tonight, Brooke?” She asked with excitement.

“Tonight?” Hunter asked.

“Going to the bars!” Kim replied with excitement.

“But we’re only sophomores! We’re not old enough to get into the bars!”

“Stop playing, Gurl! You’re the one who got us the fake IDs! Oh, and I call dibs on the room tonight. You had it Friday, Saturday, AND Sunday last week with three different guys. I had to sleep in the common area, and it’s MY turn to get some.”

“Wait...I...what?” Hunter said with shock. He was starting to think that the way people looked at Brooke didn’t have anything to do with the fact that she was a cheerleader, but due to her own decisions about how she acted that were completely within her control...

Unsuspect

“On your rounds this morning, did you see a man running in this hallway?” Officer Diaz asked.

“I see lots of people in this halls when working. Sometimes they are in a rush.” The maid replied.

“This was more of a sprint than a mere rush. Quite honestly, it seems he just disappeared. Any information you have would be helpful.”

Tony sighed. The police weren’t giving up this time. Usually, he’d steal something from a hotel room, use his device to take over an unassuming form, and the police would show up for about two hours before returning to the station. Today, they had already been here for about six. Plus, selecting the body of an aging hotel maid wasn’t exactly an ideal form to be in. His body ached; he had to go through her grueling rounds cleaning rooms. It was awful.

But it was still working. The police were clueless. They couldn’t find the suspect because there was presently no suspect to find. The stolen goods were safely stashed as well. He just needed to wait them out. Even if they took longer this time, they still ALWAYS gave up.

Late for Class

Milo hated the fact that he was running late for class. Fortunately, he discovered a short cut a while ago that he could take by cutting through the gym. He never understood why they had built the damn thing in the center of campus, but it always felt in the way of the most direct route; it also didn’t feel like much of a surprise considering how much the university spent on athletics compared to academics.

He was lost in this thought and not exactly paying attention to where he was going when he ran right into Natalie. And just like out of a movie, when their heads hit each other, they ended up swapping bodies.

“What the hell?” Natalie asked in confusion as she looked at herself.

“Oh, God!” Milo said realizing what had happened, “Could you just hand me my bag? I...I don’t have time for this! But we can discuss it after my class!”

“Your...bag...” Natalie was not catching on to what happened nearly as quickly.

“Yes, yes. I will explain it all later. Now, I need to run!”

Last Laughs at a Funeral

Margaret and Cedric had never gotten along growing up. The two siblings always fought, despite their mom’s best efforts. As they grew up, they found it best just not to speak all that often. Yet from time to time, they would be brought together; such as when their mom passed away. But even the sorrow of death wasn’t enough to keep their squabbling silent, as they broke into an argument during the reception.

The fight was stopped as a magical pulse shot between them. The next Cedric realized, he was sitting on the floor looking at his own body across the room.

“We swapped bodies?” He asked, less in shock and more in realization, “It must be mom’s doing. She never liked us fighting.”

“Our mom was a witch, but she woouldn’t do something this exteme. Besides, she’s dead!”

“Curses can linger long after the caster is dead. And do you not remember the kind of stuff mom pulled on us growing up? When you tried to sneak off to that concert, she put an arcane lock spell on your door. And what about the time she literally grounded us with our feet stuck outdoors in the garden for a day. Mom did some pretty weird sh*t.”

“Okay, so how do we break the spell? It’s not like we can ask mom.”

“Knowing her, we probably have to learn a lesson. It won’t be something as simple as saying ‘I’m sorry.’”

“Well, we better start trying to figure it out.”

Help You Up

“Here, let me help you us,” Darius heard a strangely familiar voice say.

As he reached out and opened his eyes, he was shocked to see a man looming over him. If not for his enormous size, Darius would swear this man looked exactly like he did.

As Darius reached up for the assist and finally stood up, he felt unbalanced. It was like he couldn’t touch the ground and his feet were uneven on the ground. “What the hell?” He asked with a voice that sounded squeaky and high pitched.

“Look, I don’t know how it happened,” The person that looked like Darius said, “But we swapped bodies.”

“We did what?” Darius looked down to see his new body -- the long hair, the chest, the heels on his feet. “I’m a chick?”

“Yep, you’re me, and I’m you.”

“Who are you?”

“Iris. Or I guess YOU are Iris. I’m...?”

“Darius...”

Worse

Bill was glad he was in the bathroom, because he felt like throwing up. He only hoped this was because he was so shocked to suddenly find himself swapped into the body of the woman he slept with a few weeks ago -- the woman he had cheated on his wife with.

There was, of course, the possibility that he had gotten her pregnant, and now that he was her -- the thought of that only made him feel worse.

He looked over at the toilet, wondering if vomitting would actually make him feel better...or worse.

Then came the knock. A man’s voice spoke, “Is everything okay in there, Honey?”

“Everything is fine.” Bill shouting back, “I’m just taking a giant dump!”

It sounded weird saying that with her sweet sounding voice. The man replied, “Uh...okay... Whenever you’re ready.”

Somehow knowing she also cheated didn’t help him feel any better either, and finally he leaned over the toilet bowl to blow chunks.

Family Swap

“So we all woke up in each other’s bodies this morning,” Ming tried to reason with her two adult children, “Perhaps when we go to bed tonight, we’ll swap again and wake back up in our own bodies.”

“Or it’ll get worse when Dad gets home tonight, and he’s thrown into the mix of it all,” Grace said from Ming’s body before thinking about it, “Ew, I’m not sharing a bed with Dad tonight!”

“We’ll find some excuse to have you sleep with me in Grace’s room,” Peter said from Grace’s body, “Are you sure you don’t have some ancient Chinese secret here to solve this, Mom? I feel like you always throw out some herbs or something whenever even a minor thing goes on.”

“No! This is well beyond my knowledge,” Ming replied.

“Oh, and, Mom, when Dad does get home, you’re going to have to be quiet. If he hears my voice with your accent; he’s going to know something is weird. And, Grace, do you think you can fake Mom’s accent?”

“I fake accent good!” Grace said imitating her Mom.

“I don’t sound like that! I’m not a caricature!” Ming protested.

“It’s still going to have to be good enough. You can’t both be mute when Dad comes home...” Peter reasoned.

Hopes Dashed

When they called us all down to the 6th floor for a meeting, we were hopeful. It was the dozen or so of us who had been affected by the company’s experiment, but when they asked to speak with us one-on-one, I think all of our hearts sank knowing what we were about to be told.

I went into the conference room with Taylor, she was a VP in HR. The room was far too big for the two of us, but based on the number of people and number of rooms -- someone needed to take the bigger rooms. I lifted my butt to lean on the edge of the table; I didn’t even want to sit down even on Taylor’s insistance.

She spoke for about five minutes with a bunch of corporate speak before dropping the part I knew was coming: despite the research department’s best efforts, there would be no way to swap anyone back to their own bodies.

“So I’m stuck like this?” I asked, “I’m stuck as a woman? I’m stuck being Marla?”

“Well, there’s some good news,” Taylor added, “You won’t have to pretend to be Marla anymore. We’ve worked through all the legal to ensure everyone can live as themselves despite of their new bodies.”

This gave me some relief, as living Marla’s life had been the worst thing about the swap so far. Going home to her jerk husband and posing as his wife had been awkward to say the least, particularly as I was used to being a man in any relationship. And now I’d have to explain this all to my own wife as well! Though one thing that didn’t bother me was Marla’s clothes. I don’t know why I loved them so much; they were just this wonderful mix of professional and sexy that made me feel good (though I might not admit this aloud).

The Joys of Science (Part 2)

View Part 1 of The Joys of Science.

Julian’s skinny frame had often made him a popular target for teasing, but as “Julia” it worked to his advantage. After putting on makeup and putting on his older sister’s prom dress from a few years back, he had to admit that he made a fairly attractive woman. For the final step, he removed his glasses; he could barely see but he couldn’t risk anyone recognizing the frames.

He hadn’t quite anticipated just how attractive he had become. When he arrived at the prom, he drew the attention of many guys (much to the jealousy of their dates). When Ron approached, Julian was nervous. Not only was Ron captain of the football team, he was also one of Julian’s main tormentors.

“Do you even go to this school?” Ron asked.

“Guess I just usually blend into the background,” Julian responded nervously.

“I doubt a babe as hot as you could ever blend into the background and not be noticed.”

Fortunately, a slap to the face from Ron’s girlfriend ended the conversation. But the interuptions were frequently. While Julian had intended to be in and out, it ended up staying several hours before he was able to actually slip his transformative elixir into the punch bowl. He was a little worried about the timing and whether or not many people would actually be taking a drink at this point in the night. But then again, he could use his new found popularity to ensure the biggest offenders were properly punished -- eve if the results likely wouldn’t take effect until morning...

---

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Mom

It had made sense for Thomas to pretend he hadn’t been swapped by the Great Shift. At least at first. He had found himself in the body of a middle aged woman with two scared and crying kids. Maybe it was the body’s hormones or maybe it was his conscience, but those boys needed their mom.

But as the months wore on, the role of mother grew tiresome. The final straw came one day after he learned one of the kids wasn’t actually a kid at all. It was just someone who had been swapped like he was; they had thought being in a young body again would be a great second chance to be a spoiled brat.

It was all too much to handle. Thomas was lucky that it wasn’t too late. Many people were still reporting their swaps months later. Maybe he could return to his original life despite this body, and maybe someone could actually locate these kids’ real mom.

Mirror, Mirror

Nancy couldn’t help shake the feeling that something was wrong that morning. Nothing seemed to be working quite right, people looked somewhat off in a way that she couldn’t place, and when her printer started to print out a document with the letters reversed, she realized she needed a break.

She went to the restroom to splash some water on her face, and things got even weirder. She noticed her reflection wasn’t quite matching hers. Then suddenly it all made sense; she was the one trapped in the mirror.

“Get me out of here!” She screamed.

Her own body on the other side of the mirror laughed back, “I’m sorry. There was nowhere else to put you when I stole your body. You had to go somewhere. But don’t worry; it’s nearly identical in there, just in reverse.”

“So, are you, like, my evil twin from inside the mirror?”

“What? No. I’m Jim...from the shipping department.”

Nancy just stared.

“That’s the problem,” Jim replied, “You were our supervisor and you don’t know who any of us are! You don’t care about what we need or our problems; you just cared about the bottom line. That’s why I took your body, Nancy; to be a better Nancy than you could ever be! To treat everyone in the departments you manage with kindness and respect. You deserve to be trapped in that mirror!”

Forever Vacation

How long had he been stuck on Exchange Island? Two years? Maybe three? Roy couldn’t remember anymore. But he certainly remembered how it all happened. It started out with a fairly normal trip to the resort -- well, normal by Exchange Island standards, which meant swapping bodies with someone upon arrival. In Roy’s case, he swapped with a woman and spent his week vacation trying to be as feminine as possible. It was silly and fun for him, but he couldnt wait to be back in his own body.

The only problem was when it came time to switch back; his original body couldn’t be located. The resort gave him two options: He could either return to the mainland and embrace the life of his new body, or he could stay on Exchange Island and enjoy an all-expenses-paid extention of his trip until his original body could be located.

Figuring it would only be a few days before his original body could be found, he went with the second option. But a few days passed with no word, then weeks, then months. With the hope always feeling like just a few days away, Roy rarely worried about things like plucking his body’s eyebrows or shaving his armpits or legs. With all expenses paid, he indulged heavily in the buffet every day. But the worst aspect of that hope was probably on his mental state. Hope feeling around the corner but never arriving was driving him mad; being stuck on a vacation forever without purpose probably wasn’t much better...

Your Shoes

“So, if we can’t figure out how to swap back to our own bodies, we’ll have to pretend to be each other. You have a lot to learn.” Min Ju suggested to Ted.

“How hard can it be?” Ted asked, “I already feel like I’m looking in a mirror. People aren’t going to notice anything is off no matter what we do.”

“I can see a few things just looking at you right now.”

“Like what?”

“Like your shoes.”

“You wear these shoes all the time!”

“But I don’t wear them inside! At least not inside someone’s dorm room like this. You’re an Asian woman now; you take your shoes off at the door. I mean, not like in the classroom or the student center or anything, but inside a home or an apartment or dorm you need to. And, trust me, my roommate will notice something like that.”

“Okay, what else?”

The Jackalope (Part 2)

View Part 1 of The Jackalope.

“This sucks,” Angela complained as she trudged through the forest looking for the creature that had swapped her into Cody’s body.

“Honestly, I’m surprised you came out,” Heather said from Trey’s body, “The outdoors doesn’t seem like your thing. I thought you’d wait back in the cabin like you did when we went skiing.”

“I wish! But I knew if I didn’t come out here, then Cody would. I can’t risk him staying out too long with my body and giving it frostbite or just doing something recklessly stupid. If I lose a finger on his body, who cares? And someone needs to find that antlered rabbit thing; besides, I think it sort of likes me.”

“It’s a jackalope.”

“A jack-a-what?”

“A rabbit with antlersis called a jackalope. But they’re not even supposed to exist; they’re mythical!”

“They obviously exist! We all saw it. And it was nice and friendly until all of you showed back up.”

“Hey! No blame here! I wouldn’t have thought it had the magic to swap people’s bodies either.”

Omega

“Come on, Bro, Alpha Sigma is having a killer party tonight. You gotta come!” Harrison begged his friend Alex.

“No.” Alex replied.

“You used to be the life of the party! What happened?”

“You know damned well what happened. The Great Shift happened. I turned into a f*cking woman!”

“So did I! I’m still going tonight!”

“No, you turned into a girl! How old is that body? A sophomore? Maybe a grad student at the oldest? Me? I’m like in my late forties! If I do a keg stand, I’m likely to break a hip or something! And even a single beer makes this body gassy and bloated in weird ways. You think I can handle an entire party? I’ll be asleep on the couch by 9PM!”

“We don’t HAVE to drink! We can just have fun and leave early or something!”

“At an Alpha Sigma party? Now you’re just lying to me...”

Dissociative

“You’re in serious trouble. You know that right, Mr. Paulding,” Officer Diaz said to the woman sitting on the bed in the jail cell.

The woman on the bed remained silent.

Officer Diaz continued, “We know all about the murders, the robbery, and the body swapping. And we have the evidence to prove it.”

Sam Paulding spoke from the woman’s body with a flat tone like the psychopath he was. “Let’s say you do. Did you know body swapping isn’t a crime in this state? The laws haven’t even kept up with body swapping technology. Even if I was that person you think I am, legally it wouldn’t matter; either way I am Marilyn Spitz, an innocent woman. There’s certainly no blood on my hands. There’s no way you can lock me up without putting an innocent woman behind bars.”

Officer Diaz smirked, “Then why are you already here?”

“Awaiting my lawyer.”

“Oh, that’s the good news. He’s already been called. We’re already working out a plea.”

“But you can’t prove anything!”

“It’s true that we can’t prove you committed any crime. But we can prove you’re crazy and a danger to yourself or others. Our psychologist collected enough data, and your lawyer agreed, that you have clear dissociative disorder. And I think you’d agree that you do have a certain detachment from yourself, wouldn’t you?”

At the Arcade

The arcade was crowded on Friday when Preston showed up. With tokens in his sweaty palms, it was difficult to find a machine that was open. He eventually stumbled upon a game called “Body Swap,” which he had never seen before. He wondered if it was a platformer? Or maybe a puzzle game? He shrugged, still not seeing anything else open, and stuck in one of his tokens.

A roulette wheel with various faces appeared and he wondered if this was the game’s character select screen. He pressed one of the buttons and the wheel slowly came to a stop. A young woman’s face appeared with the question “ACCEPT? Y/N!” Preston didn’t see any associated stats or any reason why this character would be a better or worse choice than any others, so he pressed “Y.”

With a sudden flash, it was now his face on the screen with the question “UNDO? Y/N!” He had thought the game had taken his photo, but a quick look at his hands revealed they were much daintier, more feminine, and paler. He looked around at the arcade to notice the layout was different. He was dumdfounded that the game had been quite literal with its title “Body Swap,” and he was now inside the woman’s body he had accepted in whatever location she had been playing at. His hand hovered over the “Y” for a few moments before noting how much less crowded this arcade was; he could actually get some good game time in. There was also just something so tempting about staying in this body that he couldn’t quite place his finger on. And soon his hand moved over to press firmly on “N.”

The Contestant

Henry had taken a sudden fall and suddenly noticed he had a very different body. And further, he seemed to be on a stage surrounded by people. There was a silent hush among the crowd. At first, he thought it might be because he wasn’t the only one who had swapped bodies.

But at it turned out, Henry had switched bodies with a beauty pageant contestant. At the moment he swapped and fell, it was a watershed moment during the swimsuit competition. The contestant he swapped with was leading, but now? Well, how could such an elegant woman be so clumsy? It would clearly cost her the competition.

Henry wasn’t exactly concerned with losing the contest, but he was absolutely panicked about being in a woman’s body. But being the only in such a strange situation? Well, he couldn’t exactly tell anyone about it. They’d think he was crazy. In fact, even hinting at it, and a few other contestants backstage chalked it up to insane fear for potentially losing after falling. He was just going to have to see this through...

Rerun (Part 4)

View Part 1 of Rerun.
View Part 2 of Rerun.
View Part 3 of Rerun.

“And I thought monsters were bad!” Jenn said, “This body is so sweaty! It feels gross! And I know nothing about baseball; what happens when it’s my turn to get up there!?”

“No, this is actually perfect,” Nick replied.

“You’re just saying that because you’re finally in a guy’s body again.”

“I mean, it does feel good not to be a woman! But that’s not what I’m talking about here. This is a live game. This is happening right now. If we went back to our living room and turned off the television, maybe we’d revert back to our original bodies.”

“Yeah, except our couch is 3,000 miles away from whre this game is happening.”

“So we just need to hope for something like a local news broadcast or something. At the right time, we’d have 30 minutes to get back home. On the right station, that’s doable. So long as no one changes the channel.”

“That’s a lot of ifs.”

“Do you really want to keep hopping from show-to-show and body-to-body dealing with possibly getting shot or real life monsters or jock itch?”

“Fine. When that happens. Let’s do it.”

Groceries

Dan had always considered himself a pretty good husband. He worked full time while his wife Tiffany stayed at home. They didn’t have kids yet, but they had been trying. Despite this, he still tried to help out around the house as much as he could.

But their routins got shaken up after they swapped bodies one night. Now Tiffany was the one having to go to work while Dan was taking care of the chores at home. Washing dishes, vacuuming, and cleaning the bathroom were all things he was used to, and he was surprised at how much free time he had after getting through it all. He decided to start planning dinner.

Realizing a few things were needed, he hopped over to the nearby store; but bringing the items back proved to be a challenge. The bag just felt so heavy! He had tried to ignore the differences of his body since the swap (which was not easy when one suddenly becomes a woman), but how much weaker Tiffany’s body was compared to his own was hard to ignore, especially when he was dragging a bag of groceries along the street back to their apartment. It was the first time he was questioning if he could really DO this!

Enjoy It!

Sitting in the park and watching the women jog by was one of Ed’s favorite activities. While he usually kept his rude thoughts to himself, every once and a while something would slip out like a catcall or a whistle. Most of the time, the women wouldn’t even give him a look; at worst, they’d shoot him the evil eye.

But after one of his unintentional comments one day, the woman jogging by just stopped. She turned toward him and walked up. She pulled him from his seated position and leaned in. For a moment, Ed thought she was going to kiss him; briefly thinking his rude comment would actually have been a plus. But then she started to exhale a pink smoke straight into his mouth.

“What are you doing?” He said meekly, realizing he wasn’t able to move on his own as he kept inhaling more and more of the smoke.

“I’m having my soul enter your body,” She said by moving his lips and speaking with his voice.

“Then...what happens to me?” He asked with the sound of his voice already cluing him into the answer.

“There isn’t enough room in a single body for two souls. You’re being pushed out to the nearest uninhabited vessel, which just happens to be mine. I hope you enjoy wearing tight yoga pants and exercising for jerks in the park to make crude comments as you run by. I hope you enjoy monthly visitors and lower pay. And I hope you enjoy riding on the train or bus and having men that grab you ‘pretend’ that it’s an accident. Really -- Ed, is it? -- I hope you enjoy being a woman.”

At the Temple

Sanjay had often been warned not to touch the artifacts in the temple. He should’ve listened. Now one of them had transformed him into a woman. It was fortunate that no one seemed to be recognize him with this body. All they saw was a beautiful woman whom they didn’t know.

It gave him the opportunity to explore the temple and find other artifacts, then he’d touch those. However, it seemed none of them were turning him back into his male self.

As the day came closer to an end, he knew that he was going to have to tell someone about what happened. He was, after all, presently a young woman with nowhere to spend the night, no money, and no identity. Maybe someone even had a way for him to return to normal. Still, he wouldn’t mind staying a woman. Everyone had been so much more polite and kind to him looking like this today than he ever remembered as a guy.

Free Meal

The last thing Joan wanted to do was go on a blind date with a guy her friends set her up with. She was quick to come up with a plan that would get her friends off her back, get this guy out of her life, and test a new invention she had been working on at her job. She called up her slacker brother Chester to discuss the plan.

They’d use the device from her work to swap bodies. She’d stay home and work on new inventions; he’d go out as her. He’d get a free meal out of it, and she even offered him $50. She was sure Chester would embarrass her enough at the restaurant with his crude attitude that his guy would never want to speak again.

Except the date ended up going extremely well. The man found Chester’s uncouth manner refreshing, and he enjoyed spending much of the night talking about video games. When the man asked for a second date, Chester didn’t know how to turn him down politely, so he agreed. When the man kissed him, he found himself leaning in and enjoying it.

Chester didn’t know what he was going to tell Joan. He was supposed to screw this up for her. She probably wouldn’t pay him, but at least he got the free meal...

An Argument (Part 1)

Stanley had overheard the couple arguing in the store, and it was what originally had drawn his attention to them. But eventually he found it hard to take his attention off the woman. She was probably around the same age as him and his own wife. There wasn’t anything particularly remarkable about her, yet he couldn’t explain why he couldn’t stop staring.

With a flash of light, the woman’s husband was now yelling in his face. It took only a moment for Stanley to realize he was now inside the body of the woman he had been staring at, and another moment to tell the husband that to shut up and explain he wasn’t this dude’s wife.

After a moment of disbeleif and more shouting from the woman’s husband, others started to talk about swapping bodies as well. He quickly became a lot more receptive to what I had to say. And despite whatever argument he may have been having before, he quickly became concrned about his wife’s safety in whatever body she ended up in.

Meanwhile, I was going to have to explain to my wife that I was now in the body of a woman. Of course, there was no telling what body my wife was in now as well. I might tell her about the arguing couple, but I probably wouldn’t explain how I was briefly mildly obsessed with the woman I ended up swapping with...

Putting Two Heads Together

“What if we sort of bang our heads together really hard like they do in the movies? Maybe that will switch us back into our own bodies?” Laura suggested.

“Yeah, that’s what they try and it never works.” Aaron replied, “We might as well try electrocuting ourselves or something like that.”

“Do you have any better ideas?”

Aaron paused before responding, “Fine. So let’s just sort of line up and...”

Aaron pushed his now ponytailed head toward Laura, but they missed each other. Then they held their hands together to line up better and finally managed to bang their heads together. Yet despite the attempt, Laura and Aaron were still stuck in each other’s bodies just now they both had headaches.

As she held her head in pain, she looked toward Aaron, “So, should we try electrocution?”

Secrets

Mark could feel the wires and machines attached to his body or, in some cases, replacing entire body parts. He couldn’t remember what had happened to him, but he was sure these machines were keeping him alive -- which meant whatever misfortune had fallen apart him must have been pretty bad. A woman was beside him, whom he had barely noticed as he tried to wrap his head around his now half-mechanical self.

“What’s your deal?” He asked her, “Are you my mechanic or something? Keeping me all tuned up or whatever?”

“You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.” She replied.

“Try me.”

She took a deep breath before saying, “I’m you.”

“What?” It was the best Mark could respond with.

She continued, “I’m not sure if I’m the original, or if you are, or if we’re both copies. But we’re both technically Mark Cooper. I think they put me in this woman’s body to torture me. I think they put me in your robotic body so they can keep reseting you; I’m pretty sure you have no idea that this is the sixth time we’ve had this conversation. I’m pretty sure they want the secrets in our head. It’s why they killed Lexi and Trevor, but we’re still here.”

“But if they have our brain, or at least a copy of it, why can’t they just extract the information.”

“Because what we know is tied intrinsically to who we are. They can’t pull out a thought at random. They need a living, thinking brain to spill the secrets...”

Not Your Husband

Darcie was shocked seeing her friend in the kitchen wearing one of her dresses. “What are you doing, Susan!?” Darcie asked, “You can’t wear something like that! That’s my husband’s body! If you go out like that, it will humiliate him! We agreed that until he comes back - - ”

“He’s not coming back.” Susan interrupted. “Maybe his plan was to steal my body all along or maybe something happened to him. But we haven’t heard from him for a week. Wherever he had disappeared to with my body, I don’t think we’ll ever see him again. That means I have to get used to being in his body. But just because I’m in a man’s body now doesn’t mean I have to act like a man! So I’m done pretending for you or for him or whoever. I’m going to wear dresses and skirts! I’m going to buy a wig! Maybe I’ll even start going on hormones! I didn’t ask to be stuck in his body; I don’t want to be a man; and I’m not your husband no matter what I might look like!”

Times Square

“Somebody stop her...or...him! They stole my body!” Zach shouted.

It hadn’t taken Zach long to realize his body had been stolen, that he was now in a woman’s body, but it was long enough that his original body had gotten a good distance away. It also didn’t help that he was in Times Square -- which was not only particularly crowded that evening, but few people cared much when a woman started screaming about a body swap. Most people just saw her as just another weirdo in Times Square; no one moved a muscle to help.

Zach tried to run after his original body, but it was no use. His original body simply slipped into the crowd never to be seen again. From there, he had to start figuring out whose body he was in now. He guessed that there had to be something bad about this woman’s life that she would steal someone else’s body to escape it. Whatever that secret was, he was now stuck with it.

Reality Changing Game

“My turn again,” Aileen said as she tried to take the remote back.

“But I haven’t guessed yet! It’s supposed to be a game! I used this reality-changing remote to change something about your body; you had to guess what I changed. Then it was your turn, and I had to guess what you changed about me. I get that I lost a few times, so you were about to go again, but I haven’t guessed this round yet!” David protested.

“Well, your time is up, so it’s my turn again.”

“There’s no rules about time limits!”

“Well, we need to set one, because you’ve taken about 30 minutes on this round. I don’t think you’re going to get it.”

Aileen wasn’t sure where David had found this weird remote that could change things about people’s personalities and bodies without them even noticing, but she was loving this game he had asked her to play. He had used the first round to make Aileen bisexual. He thought he was being subtle, but she figured it out almost instantly.

Aileen had played the game a little smarter. The first round she simply made David really, really dumb. This made it impossible for him to reason out any changes to him. Since she won the round, she got to go again. Going for an extreme, she turned him into a woman. She was completely amused that he was still too dumb to figure it out. Getting to go yet again, she made sure he wasn’t just physically a woman, but that he would dress and act like one too! There was no way he was going to figure it out. She only wanted to get control of the remote back for one final change: To convince David to give up this game and retreat to the bedroom.

Not in Trouble

The agents approached the park bench slowly, not wanting to spook their mark.

The bald headed man spoke first with a slow southern accent. “We’re from the FBI, and we’d very much like to speak with you for a minute, Mr. Reingold.”

The woman appeared nervous and seemed ready to dash off; the only thing keeping her there was likely the heels on her feet which she wasn’t used to walking in, let alone running.

“No need to panic; you’re not in trouble,” The other agent said with a refreshingly crisp voice, “We’re fully aware of your experiments and we’ve been following you. In fact, we’re very interested in the technology you’ve created.”

“We don’t mind the fun little routs you’ve gone on in various women’s bodies. Our biggest concern is bad actors,” The bald agent resumed without skipping a beat, “North Korea, Russia, Iran -- if they got a hold of this technology, it’d be bad news for everyone.”

“So we’d like to work with you, Mr. Reingold. We’ll set you up with a proper lab down in Stafford. Officially, you’ll be listed as an adjunct professor, but in reality, you’ll be able to do just about anything you want -- as long as it’s on Uncle Sam’s side, of course.”

“Of course,” The woman (who was actually Herman Reingold) said, realizing there wasn’t much of an actual choice here...