Layoffs

“I’m afraid this is never easy, but we’re going to have to let you go. You just aren’t achieving the goals we’ve set up for software developers.”

Mary protested, “But YOU’RE the software developer. Of course I don’t know anything about doing that job! I’m the head of HR. We all swapped bodies in that accident, and -- ”

“And most of us adapted by embracing the bodies we ened up in,” Andre replied, “And I have been killing it in your role as head of HR. You in my body and working as a software developer? Not so much. We’ll be offering you a comprehensive severance package, but we’ll have to escort you out once this meeting is over.”

“But how will I get my body back once the company figured out how -- ”

“Please understand that it is is considered property of the company now. We are only obliged to leave you with A body. You should’ve read your offer letter more carefully.”