Getting to Know You

I have to admit that I’ve never been a great father. After my ex-wife and I got divorced, I wasn’t around much. I finally tried to contact my son, Derek, once he got to high school, but he didn’t want much to do with me. To start, the kid was a bit of a dork. He was into gaming and Star Trek and all that. It wasn’t like my own high school, which had been mostly filled with football and drinking behind the bleachers.

It wasn’t until late in his senior year when I developed a plan to try to get to know him better. A buddy had stolen a weird magic spell from an odd shop at the mall. You simply receited some words, and you could transform your own body into any form you chose! It seemed like pure fantasy, but, dammit, it worked! After forging papers showing I was 18 and in district then transforming myself, suddenly there was a new senior girl in school!

I know what you’re thinking. A girl? Me? Yeah, it seems out of character, but remember, my son’s a dork. There was no way he had a girlfriend. How could he resist a pretty girl asking him to prom? It seemed easier to get close to him this way than trying to connect as a bro -- the kid had no interest in watching sports anyway!

And it worked! Derek started telling me everything about school and boring D&D games he played and whatnot. I’d transform into “Gwen,” go to school, and transform back to normal. When prom night came, I transformed into Gwen again, complete with a dress (cheaper than buying). We had a great time. All evening Derek was a perfect gentleman, never coming too close when we danced and only giving me a small peck on the cheek at the end of the night. Considering I was his date, this was the first time I was trankful he wasn’t the type of guy I was in high school. He dropped me off (a few blocks from my actual place), and I went to transform back. The only problem? The spell stopped working! Unless I could figure something else out, I was stuck as Gwen!